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Respected sexual health expert, Dr Lorraine Becker, successfully juggles motherhood and medicine as well as several other businesses and has more than twenty years of experience in the field of sexology.
A graduate of Wits Medical School in 1979, Dr Becker set up private practice in 1983 after several years at Johannesburg Hospital. In 1984, she completed a Diploma in Child Health (DCH) and a Diploma in Private Emergency Care in 1992.
Although involved for many years with counselling and therapy in the areas of couples and relationships, depression and anxiety, it was Dr Bernard Levinson's Sexual Health Course in 1987 that sparked her interest in human sexual behaviour.
As a member of the South African Sexual Health Association (SASHA), Dr Becker attended the First International Sex Health Congress in February 2004. She is also a direct member of the World Organisation of Family Doctors whose conferences take her to the United States on a frequent basis.
Dr Becker has hosted her own radio show for Seven years and has appeared on a number of general health programmes on television. The launch of her first book, At Last - The Truth About Lovemaking, is the realisation of a dream to reach out to couples with her experience and advice.
In 2003, she developed a homeopathic range of sexual health products aimed at assisting couples overcome a range of sexual physiological conditions standing in the way of men and women enjoying a better sexual health and enjoyment. Visit www.atlast.co.za.
Dr Becker is currently studying a Masters Degree in sexual health from the University of Sydney (Australia), and also lectures to the medical profession on Sexology.
Question
Hi Dr!
I have a problem. My baby is now eight months old and I am a working mom. I have a really loving husband which means the world to me, and pleasuring him means just as much. But since my baby was born in Feb, it seems that I just don't get aroused! He was born via C-Section. They say that this is normal for a few months after baby is born. But I'm just not in the mood for any form of love making!
I really want to please my husband en enjoy it myself! Please help!
Answer
As a new mother, you are tired, stressed and very preoccupied with the baby. Husbands often feel neglected and resentful that they are no longer the major focus of your life.
I always advise my patients to 'Keep in Touch'. This means using cuddling, massage,and caressing as a means of being intimate.( Outercourse as opposed to Intercourse.) Making love should include the whole body, not just the sex organs!
Try to arrange some quality time for the two of you to just communicate, share and relate. Try a night away with some fantasy and a massage for both of you. If he is turned on and you are exhausted, compromise by having a quickie or satisfy him in other ways. Tell him how important he is and get his help with the baby and some household chores. Explain to him that if he helps, you will have more time for him!
The more orgasms you have, the more your libido will be restored. Practice makes perfect!
- Dr Lorraine Becker
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